My first VidCon is approaching, and I feel I should be more excited about it, but I’m not. I have several theories as to why this is.
Instead of flying I’m driving and it’s a route I’ve taken far too many times in my lifetime. Nearly every summer my family would take a long road trip from Dallas to Phoenix (sometimes Nevada and California) to visit family there. It would start off exciting but then it would get really boring towards the middle of the desert. I think it would start to get to everyone in the car ’cause we’d all end up crying, hanging out of our respective windows to allow the desert wind to dry our wet faces.
Why fly if I don’t feel like driving? Well, the last few flights I’ve been on have been really bumpy. I freaked out recently one time so I just need a break from flying right now. And well, I did get into a car accident recently but pfft, car accidents.
My energy is also still recovering from socializing beyond my limits at BiSC. I had a fantastic time but socializing with a lot of people at once drained me tremendously. I was incredibly anti-social when I got home, refusing Twitter, Facebook, blogging, phone calls; I drew the shades shut and sat in my leather arm chair all evening in a burgundy silk robe with Rufus Wainwright and José Gonzales softly playing on my 1983 record player made of oak wood. There will be many people at VidCon that I want to see and meet and hang with, so I’m daunted by the possibility of draining myself again. Guh!
After the tremendous, earth-shattering, overcome-with-emotion greatness of visiting the Pacific Northwest this month, I’ve just wanted a break from traveling a lot. I want to enjoy my state now. Texas needs me. I am leaving this great state/country for Washington soon, and I want to start my “Lasts” tour now. And really, “Lasts” is an exaggeration because I’m sure I’ll return to Texas at some point. But they are my “Lasts” for a while.
I just need a break from traveling for a while. So, I guess it’s not really that I’m not excited about VidCon, but I’m not excited about the trek there.
Note: I’m being melodramatic in this post. I don’t own a leather arm chair or an oak record player.