Thirty-two Down From Forty-five

As an adult you have a million things to do for you alone, including monitoring and upkeeping your sugar intake, your cholesterol, brushing your teeth day and night, bathing, making sure you’re not driving your significant other crazy with your deprivations (sleep, hunger, dehydration, sex). You also have bills to pay, which means you have to get up early in the morning and give 8 hours of your day to the Man.

But you also are able to live your life however you want and make your own decisions. You’re allowed to have sex whenever and with whomever and how often you want (within reason, of course). You’re allowed to make babies. You’re allowed to watch cartoons and eat ice cream whenever and how often you want. You can drive.

Being an adult you realize that grown-ups are still just kids with wrinkles, grumpy faces, and lower energy, and no one knows what they’re doing with their lives.

I’ve chosen to live it up the best way I can.

Go rockclimbing, sing karaoke, skinny dip, live on a nudist community. Do crazy stuff, so that when you’re 70 on your deathbed, you can look back and think how crazy you were. You can die laughing, instead of regretting.

To my 19-year old self: heartbreak will make you feel 45-years old. Let it go as much as you can and don’t worry. Focus on loving yourself and one day you will be loved again.

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